He was standing
at the kitchen door shouting profanities. I asked him to please leave
me alone. I said,"I am tired and want to get some rest, that I didn't
want to fight" He stood at my face and threatened to kill me, he spat
at me, poured a coke on me. All I could do was cry, I ran for the
phone and before 911 could get through he pulled it out of the wall,
I was weeping turning on the shower and all of the sudden I felt him
grab me by the neck, telling me I wasn't allowed to take a shower,
he threw me to my knees with such force that my body flew into the
tub, my glasses ripped from my face and body all bruised.
As I lay defenseless on the floor, I was screaming in the hopes that
someone would hear me and come to my rescue, but no one came and he
just got more violent with me, he stretched my mouth to the sides
until it was swollen and bleeding. Finally I was able to get out of
the house, he followed me and blocked me off, ripped the keys from
the ignition and forced me to get out. He proceeded to destroy my
car and I got in the middle screaming, crying. So he jabbed the key
into my leg, blood was gushing out and I now I am unable to walk without
pain. And all along he claims I DESERVED MORE, THAT I AM NOT WORTHY
OF ANYTHING BETTER.
And this is only one of the many times hes abused me, or my things.
Things are only getting worse because I have finally gotten the courage
to stand up for myself.
This is the man I loved, that doesn't work and have been supporting
for the past 2 years, and this is how he pays me back.
As I went through the internet I found the following readings, which
touched my heart and took the liberty of copying them so I can read
them as often as I want, for I'm not allowed to use the internet at
my leisure, even if I'M the one paying the bills.
~~
I Got Flowers today ~~
I got flowers today
It wasn't my birthday or any other special day.
Last night we had a fight and he hit me,
But I know he is sorry
Cause I got flowers today
I got flowers today
It wasn't our anniversary or any other special day.
Last night he threw me against the wall and started to choke me,
But I know he's sorry,
Cause I got flowers today
I got flowers today
It wasn't Mothers day or any other special day
I was so swollen and bruised I was ashamed to answer the door
But I know he's sorry,
Cause I got flowers today
If I leave him, where will I go?
What about money? what about my kids?
It's getting worse every time but I'm afraid to leave But I know
he's sorry
Cause I got flowers today
I got flowers today
My family and friends filed by to see me
Asking why I never left him,
If I only had the strength and courage to, but I didn't
So I got Flowers today
________________________________________________________________________
Does Heaven have a phone number?
Mommy went to Heaven, but I need her here today,
My tummy hurts and I fell down, I need her right away,
Operator can you tell me how to find her in this book?
Is heaven in the yellow part, I don't know where to look.
I think my daddy needs her too, at night I hear him cry.
I hear him call her name sometimes, but I really don't know why.
Maybe if I call her, she will hurry home to me.
Is Heaven very far away, is it across the sea?
She's been gone a long, long time she needs to come home now!
I really need to reach her, but I simply don't know how.
Help me find the number please, is it listed under "Heaven"?
I can't read these big big words, I am only seven.
I'm sorry operator, I didn't mean to make you cry,
Is your tummy hurting too, or is there something in your eye?
If I call my church maybe they will know.
Mommy said when we need help that's where we should go.
I found the number to my church tacked up on the wall.
Thank you operator, I'll give them a call.
________________________________________________________________________
· Physical battering
-- The abuser's physical attacks or aggressive behavior can range
from bruising to murder.
· Psychological battering -- The abuser's psychological or
mental violence can include constant verbal abuse, harassment, excessive
possessiveness, isolating the woman from friends and family, and depriving
her of food, money, clothes, and destroying her personal property
If your partner repeatedly uses one or more of the following to control
you;
· pushing, hitting, slapping, choking, kicking, or biting
· threatening you, your children, other family members or pets
· using or threatening to use a weapon against you
· keeping or taking your paycheck
· puts you down or makes you feel bad
· forcing you to have sex or to do sexual acts you do not want or
like
· keeping you from seeing your friends, family or from going to work
YOU HAVE BEEN ABUSED!!
Monica sent this
story and the items she found on various domestic violence support
websites. She gave permission to reprint her story here. You can discuss
this topic on:
"The Survivor's
Post" message board forum.
Copyright 2001
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